(2009-04-30) Overcoming Bitterness
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There is
Overcoming Bitterness
Patrick Morley said that we all have disappointments, large and small, that get us down.
In his book: Second Wind for the Second Half, he asks the daunting question: “How can a man not get what he wants and still be happy?
Many people go through life with the intense pain of bitterness. Bitterness because of various reasons: Disappointment, expectations not being met, a sense that you deserve better. Perhaps sometimes you experience how people close to you do not acknowledge or appreciate you for who you are. The list goes on…
People handle bitterness in different ways. Things like pretending there is no pain, revenge, gossip, divorce, separation, withdrawal, trying to forget about it, etc. The problem with all these negative solutions is the fact that it only leads deeper into a downward spiral.
Refuse to Forgive
Personally I agree with Patrick that bitterness is only the price of not forgiving.
By forgiving others, you will be delivered from the stronghold of bitterness!
Patrick Morley says ‘it is without regard to whether or not the party, who offended you, seeks Forgiveness.’ He says that ‘forgiving others is not contingent on their seeking forgiveness. Forgiving them is for the health of your heart – not theirs. (If they seek forgiveness then they can get a healthy heart too) Don’t let what they do, or don’t do, block you from setting yourself free from the gnarly, tangled root of bitterness.’
The Bible says, “So if you are presenting a sacrifice at the altar in the
Seek Forgiveness
Patrick says that ‘in the same way we have been hurt by others, we have hurt them.’
For this reason, I believe that the mutual healing process can be accelerated if you are willing to seek forgiveness from those you have hurt.
Repeatedly Offer Forgiveness
Morley says ‘by forgiving the sin of other, you will be free from the stronghold of bitterness!’
In Matthew 18:21-22, Peter asked Jesus a question on forgiveness, on which Jesus gave him a solid answer:
‘Then Peter came to him and asked, “Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?”
“No, not seven times,” Jesus replied, “but seventy times seven!”’
‘Jesus meant as often as someone sins against you.’
Why don’t we pray together right now?
Prayer for You
God Almighty, I bring this reader friend, whom You love so much, before You.
Give him/her the grace to acknowledge any bitterness in his/her life. Help him/her to be able to forgive the sins of those who trespass against him/her.
Heal his/her heart and make him/her stronger than the pain so real in his/her life.
Minister to him/her in a way that he/she will experience change and start loving again, notwithstanding.
Lord, grand him/her again freedom in his/her heart. Let him/her experience Your peace.
I pray this in the precious, powerful Name of our Lord, Jesus Christ.
Amen
Sandwich for the Road
Patrick Morley use the story in his book about the traveler who was offered a lift by wagon, and refused to take off his heavy pack, with the explanation: “Oh no, young man, I couldn’t do that. It was enough that you offered me this ride. I couldn’t expect you to carry my burden too” (Hannah Whitall Smith)
Why this Big Sacrifice?
In Romans 8:18-30, through the pen of the Apostle Paul, we find the answer for perseverance: Never to give up. There is Hope!
18 Yet what we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory he will reveal to us later. 19 For all creation is waiting eagerly for that future day when God will reveal who his children really are. 20 Against its will, all creation was subjected to God’s curse. But with eager hope, 21 the creation looks forward to the day when it will join God’s children in glorious freedom from death and decay. 22 For we know that all creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. 23 And we believers also groan, even though we have the Holy Spirit within us as a foretaste of future glory, for we long for our bodies to be released from sin and suffering. We, too, wait with eager hope for the day when God will give us our full rights as his adopted children, [Greek: wait anxiously for sonship] including the new bodies he has promised us. 24 We were given this hope when we were saved. (If we already have something, we don’t need to hope [wait] for it. 25 But if we look forward to something we don’t yet have, we must wait patiently and confidently.)
(Romans 8:18-25 NLT)
Seek a Mentor
As social beings, we sometimes need a friend, mentor or coach to walk alongside us. Someone who perhaps has experienced similar scenarios in life, willing to help carry the load. Someone who can be an accountability partner, checking me up on my commitments.
Different Options: (We can help you with the following)
· Mentoring:
1. Are you interested in how to receive Christ as your Saviour and Lord?
2. As a Christian, do you experience defeat and emotional conflict?
3.
Do you need material that can help you grow in your relationship with the Lord?
· Coaching:
‘Coaching is a method of directing, instructing and training a person or group of people, with the aim to achieve some goal or develop specific skills.’ – Wikipedia.
‘Coaching is an ongoing professional relationship that helps people produce extraordinary results in their lives, careers, businesses or organizations.’ – Marcia Wieder
· Retreat:
Plan a break-away (individual, family or corporate), where you can spend some time in a structured, informal, & relaxed environment to work things through.
Use TIHM’s Web Form to contact us, and spell out your need.
Book: Second Wind for the Second Half
The chapter on Overcoming Bitterness can be found in Patrick Morley’s book,
Second Wind for the Second Half. (Also the author of the well known – Man in the Mirror)
This powerful book is especially written for those going through changes in life.
It can be ordered through our office.
Email us with your order: hope@hope365.co.za
Until the whole world knows,
Pieter Brits
Director: There is
Internet, Mentoring, Coaching & Training
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Office (08h00–16h00): 028 271 5124
Email: hope@hope365.co.za
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